Blessed

i feel so blessed these past two months because he came into my life.
i never thought i could love so deeply and completely.
he loves me and respects me and trusts me.
it is so satisfying to be giving my love to a man that appreciates me.
all my past hardships and heartache are a lesson learned so i can love him better.

he is amazing.
he is full of energy.
he is full of life.
he is my happy thought.

i know it's silly and girlish to giggle when i think about him,
but i feel high on this love we have.
i'm blessed to have him.
i'm blessed to love him.
i'm blessed to be in his life.

i remember what it was like before him, i was sad.
i was lonely.
i was depressed.
i was being used.
i was letting myself be used.

now i'm in a good relationship.
we are balanced with each other.
i can't wait to meet his boys.
i can't wait to have his baby.
life is so good right now!

of course, i wonder if he's too good to be true.
he wonders the exact same thing about me.
i'm trying to forget about fear and doubt,
i opened my heart to him and we are right together.
my puzzle is completed.
my love is being returned.

the other day i helped him sort receipts at his work.
i helped him and took a small task so he could do other things.
we laughed. we talked. we enjoyed being in each other's company.
there was no time for sex.
we shared a few kisses.
and i felt happy, so happy, just to be near him.

he's become my best friend and i love him!

New Horizons

life is so good right now.
i am happy and content.
he's so perfect for me.
i get so excited when i see him i jump up and run to him.
i've never been like this with a man.

i've always held something back.
or i found a flaw i used to throw back at them.
he's awakened a renewed since of hope in me.
i feel an urgency to show him my love.
i don't hide how i feel.
i don't try to manipulate him.

he feels like home.

this is a new horizon for me.
these experiences he brings to me are energizing me in a way i've not known before.
this is how being in love should be.
i want to lift him up not tear him down.
he wants me to feel sexy and loved.
he doesn't point out my flaws and make me feel small.

he's truly a gentleman.
he shows me respect.
that's what i had been missing with the others.
i'd throw in my line for their love and they'd nibble but never bite.
for the first time, i feel like this is right!

i'm not scared.
i'm not full of doubt.
my friend and others are like this is too fast.
you need to slow it down.
but why?

we want to be together.
isn't that what love means, two people that want to spend time together.
two people that want to please each other.
two people that support one another.

i finally got a man i can see spending the rest of my life with
and i'm in this all the way!

harry potter at 12:10 AM, this is gonna be fun, if i stay awake

so my kid talked me into another midnight showing, this time for the last harry potter film, we are taking tissues, because we fully expect to cry.
the last midnight showing i went to was for the then latest release of the twilight series. i was showing my age man!!

i had my first red bull, and mr. bindi was created,
imaging this in a badly attempted porno style male french accent,
"hello, i am mr. bindi, and i'll be your straw this evening.
suck from me the juices and i will fill you up"

and it wasn't even a bindi straw :)

i might have to try monster drink tonight, i wonder what my hopped up but totally exhausted brain will create this evening. we shall see.
my kid is afraid and i am little afraid myself.
i don't do well when sleep deprived, staying up past 10 takes effort, especially since my meds are designed to help me get sleep.
i'll have to delay taking my meds, and that is risky for everyone, i am medicated for my own safety as well as the publics.

so exicited!!!

O the humanity!!!

Random thoughts and quotes...

all hatred begins with a seed of fear.

do dogs really love us or just love that we feed them and pet them. And isn't that what all love is, attention, dedication, and simple pleasures. So if we loved our loved ones the way we love our dogs, would the world be a happier place?

ranch dressing mixed with sour cream put on pizza = FANTASTICALLY YUMMY!!!

pedicures are great, not only do i get a foot rub, snazzy toe nail polish, and my ingrown big toe dug out, but i get to sit for an hour and not think about a damn thing, that is priceless!!!

summer = sunburn :(

i always thought i'd be famous for something stupid, but i'm not worried, i still have time to fuck up and make national news headlines!

i think about food more then sex, but sex is a very close 2nd.