Cramps and Boredom

well my female cycle was late and for some reason it has come with a fury.
i'm cramping, bleeding through pads, and i hurt like crazy.
i try all the pms pills but they don't help.
i have no appetite, no joy, no hope, no desire to move.
i just want to stare into the inside of my eyelids and not sleep.
i love this boredom because i choose it.

still no house.
we are on hold until the end of july.
i feel like goldilocks, this house is too small,
this house is too big, there's a basement, there's a funky smell, etc..
the one house we wanted we got outbid on, oh well.
maybe the summer we will have better luck and find that one house that is for us.

so today the big plan is to do laundry and be lazy.
i think i can do it!

An Unexpected Pleasure

wow, what a change in my life in less then a week.

i took the jeep into a shop to have the oil changed, tires rotated, and an alignment completed.
the neighbor that sold me the jeep recommended this place.
i booked an appointment on friday of last week and the guy on the phone was really funny.
he asked if my husband would be bringing the car in and i told him i was divorced.
he told me a joke,

you know why divorce is so expensive?

no

because it's worth it!!!

i thought that was so funny.

so i'm thinking the next day is st. patty's day and he sounded cute.
so i put on mascara, my dr. pepper chapstick, my new jeans, a tank top and a pretty new low cut t-shirt,
you know, just in case he's single and cute.

i walk in for my appointment and he immediately says, wow, great to see that smile.
i recognize his voice and i say hi, and he's like i talked to you yesterday on the phone.
and i'm like yes, i loved your joke.

so i decided to stay and hang out.
we are flirting.
i offer him my number.
he says he can't take it, but he can give me his number.
so the car is done and the amount isn't anywhere near what he quoted me.
it was just the oil change, i asked what happened to the alignment.
he said he didn't hear me, and i leaned in and said, you were too busy looking at my boobs.
he laughed and said yes i was.
so he's going to call me when i can bring the jeep back for alignment since the rack is taken.

so i'm taking the kid out to lunch and he text me.
we start texting then sexting alot.
i take the jeep back in and we are flirting like crazy in between his customers.
the kid is packing to head out to grandma's for spring break.
she's like quit flirting and bring the jeep home.
but the jeep wasn't done.
and it has ball joints going bad, so there's a couple of hundred bucks.
that's the only bad news from the luckiest st. patty's day i've ever had :)

i finally get home and the kid head's out.
he comes over after work and we're just supposed to get to know one another.
no sex, just maybe some kissing and talking.
figuring stuff out, like what this is and what we want.
he's divorced. he's got 3 boys under age 13.
he just wants to have some fun.
well we all know how the last two men i tried just to have fun with worked out.
but i told him i'd think about it and we had sex.
doggy style, bent over the couch,
i had an orgasm in 15 minutes, the neighbor didn't accomplish that in 5 months!!!

needless to say, i am once again trying a just for fun sexual relationship.
he came over yesterday too and we had sex and i had a record 8 orgasms in 45 minutes.
he's an alpha male too and i'm totally loving it.
i'm sure this relationship has an expiration date as well.
i ruin everything, but for now, i'm sore and extremely high on all the sex hormones.
so he has definitely brought me unexpected pleasure.
he calls and he texts me and he's not hiding anything that i know about.
and we are using birth control.
i told him upfront that i wasn't on any birth control.
i really meant it when i said i was done with secrets and lies.
wish me luck!!!

Drained and Good Luck?

I am conflicted. I won a 24 inch flat screen tv at the company picnic, which is the biggest and bestest thing I've ever won in my entire life!!!! So that's the Good Luck part of this and I am excited. I was so excited and happy. It's all hooked up in my bedroom. It was such a luxury to sit in bed last night and watch some tv. And I really needed to be in bed, because I think I'm getting sick.

I am so drained. Not tired, drained of all energy. I've already taken a 2 hour nap today and I had to struggle through taking Sophie to the dog park, then running a few errands. I thought I was going to pass out in the fabric store! I came home and walked Sophie to the mailbox then I collapsed into bed for 2 hours of complete unconsciousness!

Sophie started licking me and waking me up after 2 hours, but I'm still dragging, I've been out of bed an hour and I'm ready to go back to bed. I didn't even watch tv from bed this morning. It's like all my energy has been stolen away by some evil super villian. My period did start so maybe that's causing it, but usually i'm just tired and cranky when it starts. The level of exhaustion I'm experiencing now has been rare in my life and usually comes with sickness. My sinus' have been acting up. I hope they aren't getting infected.

But this is my life, for every good thing that happens to me there are 3 bad things waiting in the wings. I should be used to it by now.