December Gray with Christmas Blues

This holiday season has snuck up on me. I find myself missing the holiday spirit and my brother. A year has passed since he died so very quickly. Dad is lonely without him. He has no one to complain and stump with about the current poltical climate. He is into the "alternate news". I just think there are more important and interesting things in this life to talk about then politics. It is all the same with politicals. All the fighting and finger pointing. It is always the other parties fault. No one ever accepts responsibility or takes accountability for their actions. And you can never get anyone to change their mind; they think they are always right, so what is the point; I find life blah right now. I feel redundant! I see this world full of light, gray, and darkness. The scale is always moving between the good and the evil, never in balance, never staying still, never at peace. Always at struggle, I am always struggling to keep ahead of my own demons. I am struggling to stay hopeful. I have started to take care of my health again, after neglecting it for all of 2020. I am on new diabetes medications, a new diabetes meter, working on eating healthy, and even going to the dentist for the first time in 6 years. I will have to take a day off for the dentist; having my teeth cleaned gives me a migraine. It will be a journey, my health, a day to day journey with no end. The thought overwhelms me, but I must try....

10 years later

9/11/11 - 10 years have past, but it could be a 100 years and the pain lingers, you will not be forgotten.

Life is eternal; and love is immortal; and death is only a horizon; and a horizon is nothing save the limit of our sight. ~ Rossiter W. Raymond

we must remember, keep the pain close, and hold onto it, pass it down, and let our children's children know the heartache. remembering is the only way to make sure this tradgedy is never repeated. once we forget our past we open the door to repeating it's mistakes.

may peace begin within you and spread outward from you like the brightest light that no darkness can ever conquer!