Day 6 of my no tv challenge

Almost turned on the tv when i sat down to eat dinner, caught myself, some bad habits die hard!

work was frustrating, i had a miscommunication that resulted in some work having to be redone. i was talking oranges and they was talking apples. i just need to shake it off and accept i made a mistake and move on. it really was my fault.

so it is too hot and humid to go outside to unwind so i'm eating a tapioca snack pack and listening to the hum of the air conditioner. ah, the joy of air conditioning! God Bless the human being that invented it. Houses are built like little vacuum sealed look alike packages anymore. And would be unbearable without heat and air conditioning. I don't know how I survived my childhood with no air conditioning in the summer, well the house was old and had huge windows and was built to let air move around, but it still got really yucky hot inside the house sometimes.

my mind is burnt out right now. i think i will try to read some scripture, not sure if that will calm my mind or confuse me more. i guess i'm gonna find out.

Memorial Day 2011

Memorial Day is a day to remember those who have served in America's armed services. My family has a long tradition of serving this country. So Thank you Grandpa Stokes, Dad, Mom, Uncle Jerry, my two brothers, John and Jason, my sister-in-laws Donna and Tracy. Thank you for your sacrifices during WWII, Vietnam, Desert Storm, and the current battle against Terrorism.
Thank you for fighting for freedom and democracy!!!!
I love you all very much.

I'd also like to thank all service men and woman who have served and are serving in the armed forces for their sacrifices for freedom and democracy.
I have traveled over seas and I know there is no country as free and as blessed as the U.S.A. So thank you, to each and every one of you, for the every day freedoms we have here in America!!!

It is easy to forget how free we are here. We can disagree with our President and other politicians. We can hold protests. We can vote. We can run for office. There are so many freedoms in this country that are not available in all countries. We forget how blessed we are to live in America!!!

So on Memorial Day let us remember, it's not about the hot dogs, the parades, the indy race or even the fireworks, it is about each man and woman that have served in the military and what they have sacraficed to keep freedom free!!!

God bless you and God Bless America!!!!

day 3 of the no tv challenge

i find it easier to not watch tv when my kid is not home. she is working today and tomorrow, so i have the house to myself. i was sitting on the patio enjoying the beautiful rain free day. the dog was rolling in the grass. i'm listening to my music and relaxing.

the laundry is going and i've already taken the dog on a nice walk. this is freedom! today is full of promise. the house is quiet and i feel calm.
i am loving my tv free life!!!

Day 1 of breaking the habit

the summer season has begun. There is no better time to take a break from the television. I am challenging myself to go 3 months with no t.v. I hope to become more productive with my time.

There is more to life then flipping through channels and watching a rerun of a show you've already seen a dozen times. I want to spend more time outside. I want to explore my own reality, not some rich, pampered person's reality. Mine will never be like that so why bother.

I need to focus on doing things that fulfill me and enlighten me. It is time for a change and I am making that change today.

my kid is exempt from this challenge, she threatened to stick her foot up my arse if i got the cable disconnected. :(

wow, more rain

the rain keeps coming.
i've had to empty sophie's baby pool 4 times now.
my daughter started to complain saturday that it was too hot.
i told her to shut her mouth and be happy it isn't raining and cold.
she jinxed us, because yesterday the rain started and it is still going strong this morning.

people are never happy.
the grass is always greener on the other side.
why can't we just enjoy the moment?

i even got a little sunburn saturday.
i had sunblock on, it's in my moisturizer, and still got red.
the sun and i have not had a pretty relationship for the past 10 years.
the older i get the less time i spend outside.
so i burn alot faster now then when i was a kid.
and the sunburns are more severe, one year i got blisters!!
that really hurts.

i tried to buy some flowers saturday morning to plant in my little patch of dirt next to my huge concrete patio.
i was in the gardening section outside of the store for less then 10 minutes when i had to go inside because i went into a full blown allergy attack.

my eyes kept itching and watering for another 30 minutes inside the store.
i also kept sneezing!
what is the point of taking an allergy med every morning for the past 3 months if i can't even pick out flowers????

i guess i will just try again this weekend and take the kid so we can speed flower shop! that will be interesting.

yo yo weather sucks

last week we hit the high 80's, yesterday the high was 48 :(

i'm sick again, sore throat, fever, headache, and i hurt like a truck ran over me.

i hate this yo yo weather.

it's been raining non stop for like a month.
even the dog is getting sick of it.
whenever the rain stop she runs to where her leash is, like she is saying, hurry walk me before the rain comes back.

we are supposed to get more rain and be back in the 80's again by the weekend. i can't remember how it feels to feel the warmth of the sun upon my face. no wonder i have to take a vitamin D supplement.

this weather isn't helping me feel any less depressed.
rain, go away!!!!

Upbeat Day

after a brutally long work day yesterday, i thought i'd wake up feeling exhausted and burnt out, so it was a happy surprise to realize i feel great!
i'm in a good mood. i'm feeling happy and content. maybe it's finally an up day in the bi-polar universe and it's about damn time.

i've been reading positive books, like Gordon B. Hinckley's 10 Virtues to Stand up for and Mariann Williamsons Everyday Graces. Excuse me if the spelling is wrong or the title inaccurate the books are upstairs and i don't feel like going up to get them.

i've noticed when i surround myself in positive things, movies, books, scripture, people, that temporarily i feel positive myself. i am unable to sustain the momentum though and the darkness always calls me back, the curse of being bi-polar 2.

maybe it's a good day because i woke up and for once, in what has seemed an eternity, it is not raining, the sun is out!!!! it is very cold outside and it is odd to have the furnace on in May, the last time I had to wear my winter coat in may, i was in 8th grade and had a mullet, but the sun is such a welcome reprieve from the gloomy rains.

go outside today and just be thankful to see the sun, that's what i'm going to do today!!!

Mark Twain is timeless

"I've never wished a man dead, but I've read some obituaries with great pleasure." - Mark Twain

Wow, the is how i felt today reading the news that bin laden had been killed. i just love Mark Twain.

"An inglorious peace is better than a dishonorable war."
- Mark Twain 1906

I hope for a long moment of peace.