Diabetes and Me

Well, it has finally happened, I was diagnosed with Diabetes.
Sugar and I have to break up.
This will be the hardest thing I will ever have to do.
I don't need medicine or shots.
And I plan to keep it that way.

I also was prescribed medicine to help with my anxiety, mood swings, and sleep problems.
I haven't had a restful night's sleep in months.
I feel like an Alien living in my own body at times.
I drop things. I can't form sentences. I can't think of simple words.
I get confused. I zone out. I take twice as long to complete anything.

I'm surrounded by stress.
Work is stressful.
Buying a house is financially stressful.
My kid is stressful.
My coping skills have been tapped out.
I feel like I'm being attacked from all sides.
I even feel like Sophie the Puggle has been too demanding lately.

I have no patience.
I just want to curl in a ball in my room and never come out.
I've gained 25 pounds since March.
I have been eating sweets, carbs, and fatty foods because they comfort me.
And now I have to pull my head out of my ass and knock it off.
I don't have a death wish, but at times I realize I am eating myself to death.

The kid and I have given up pop.
She drank regular and I can tell she has lost weight.
I drank diet and I haven't lost a pound.
I do notice I don't crave sweets as much.

I can get control of my eating.
I ordered a diabetic food tracker and signed up for an on-line diabetes management site.
I think I'm going to try and find a class to take in Jan. after all the moving has settled down.
I close on the house Thursday.
Then I will spend weeks moving and unpacking and cleaning.
I can do this. I just have to keep reminding myself I can do this.